Anti-materialism in 4th-grade science
My son Oz (in 4th grade) brought home some homework covering the study of matter in his 4th grade science lesson. Here’s a couple of lines from the narrative page “explaining” atoms and matter:

And on the next page, they quizzed him, to make sure he’d accepted the anti-materialist dogma. 
When I asked Oz what was wrong with that, he thought for a minute, and then said “They’re in your brain!”
I’ve raised him well.